Online dating tips and relationship advice from Dr. Neder...
Help!
My World Is Crumbling!
Doc:
I met a girl that has been hurt by a lot of guys in her past
and I asked her out but I got turned down because she said
she wanted to face her studies squarely.
She came back home on Christmas break and I asked her again
and we were so close to getting together, but then, she found
out I had been flirting with another girl while she was gone
to school which she took as something of importance and turned
me down again because she couldn’t trust me with her so she
said.
I then forwarded messages from the girl I used to mess with
who was wondering why I cut her off to her and she didn’t seem
to care. I like this girl so much that I'll do anything for
her. I even had her meet my parents just to prove to her that
I was real but then I think me apologizing when I didn't have
to made the whole situation blow up in my face.
I asked her to meet me for Valentines Day. She said she wasn't
sure if she's free on that day, then I sent her texts and called
since then and got no reply.
PLEASE HELP! I’m lost and I don’t want to lose this girl!
------------------------- Hello!
What the hell are you doing here??? Sure, you like this girl
so much that you'd do anything for her - expect exactly what
you SHOULD be doing! Stop this nonsense right now! What are
you, her therapist? Are you trying to make all her boo boos
all better? You absolutely CAN NOT do this!
You need
to pull your head out and see this for what it really is:
she's a manipulative, insecure little
bitch! How DARE she
turn you down and then get angry for you being interested in
some other girl! All this girl is doing is using your own naïveté against
you! She's manipulating you to be alone and waiting for her
when she doesn't plan to give you any play whatsoever!
This has
absolutely NOTHING to do with "trust" at
all! It has everything to do with this little bitch knowing
she has your balls in a noose and is using it against you!
Stop being her pet and start being a man ready! The reality
is that you've probably already lost her by doing all these
dumb things! No woman wants to be with any guy that absolutely
needs to have her. That's far too much pressure. I don't care
what you've seen in romantic comedies! Those are fantasy and
this is reality. You're going to need to get distant from this
girl! In fact, if she's away at school, you don't have any
way of building anything with her anyway until she comes home
for good!
Look - I know you're hurting, but this is entirely self inflicted!
You need to see that you've LET her manipulate you. You've
even encouraged her by jumping through her little hoops. This
girl has a serious mental illness and is punishing you for
her problems. I suggest you tell her flat-out that if she doesn't
want you dating other girls, then she'd better step up and
fill in the gaps.
This is YOUR life you're talking about here. You get to decide
what you want and what you don't want. As soon as you give
that away, no girl will ever be interested in you. It's that
very masculine power that women crave. You've simply thrown
all of that in the toilet because you think that prostrating
yourself is the key to a woman's heart. It absolutely IS NOT.
Best regards...
> Home > Dr.
Neder Relationship Advice: Main Page
- - - - - - - -
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
- - -
Have a love, relationship,
sex or man/woman question? I answer all email. You can write
to me at dwneder@beingman.com
for answers. For more information about my books, "Being
a Man in a Woman's World" (volume I & II), and other
products visit: www.beingaman.com.
Check out the discussion group at: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/beingaman.
Copyright (c) 2004-2011, Dr. Dennis W. Neder
All rights reserved.
|