Online dating tips and relationship advice from Dr. Neder...
How to
NOT Impress Women With Gifts
Hi Doc!
This girl I know casually through work invited me to a party.
I am going to give her a nice perfume that costs about $100.
Is that a good idea? She also said there will be lots of girls
there. How do I start a conversation with a girl in a party
and get her phone number? This is a big opportunity for me
- please help!
--------------------------- Hello!
DO NOT give her that gift!!!!
Why would you give someone something so huge to someone you
barely know? You're not going to impress her at all - you're
going to make her feel creepy!
What are you trying to do here exactly? Are you trying to
buy her interests in you? Do you really believe that if you
spend this much money on her that she's going to feel obligated
to go out with you? Trust me on this one: she may thank you,
but she's never going to invite you to any more parties! Nor
is any girl there going to think you're some hero because you
did this. It's just creepy!
Instead, come up with a nice, simple gift and maybe a card
that says that you are happy to celebrate her birthday. Keep
it simple! If you come up with something thoughtful that costs
around $25, you're going to really come off as clever; especially
if it somehow relates to how you know her.
What you're asking me is a very large, involved question!
I given entire seminars and have books, CD's and DVD's that
go into the approach, pick-up and close! It's not something
I can give you in just one - or 100 emails!
However, I'll give you this: when you see a girl you're interested
in, go up to her and ask her how she knows the girl that's
having the birthday. Are they friends or family? Have they
known each other for a long time? What does she do for a living?
Where is she from?, etc. Get to know the girl - don't talk
about yourself other than when she asks you questions.
Plan to
spend no more than 10 minutes with any one girl, and at the
end, just say, "Hey, it was nice to talk to you.
Let's do this again some time. Here, write down your phone
number and we'll get together." Then, just hand her a
blank piece of paper and a pen. DO NOT hand her a page with
someone else's phone number on it! Then, when she writes down
her digits, make sure you get her name on it, then, excuse
yourself and go meet someone else.
In the meantime, be sure to write down information you learned
about the girl on the page along with her number. That way,
you'll remember it when you call her later.
Best regards...
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