Online dating tips and relationship advice from Dr. Neder...
Get Over
Being Shy!
Doc:
There's this girl at school who is a real knockout. She and
I really hit it off, and I want to ask her out on a date. I've
given that up now however. There's another guy that's really
good looking and smooth that's been spending time with her.
I used to be quite close with her, and now it feels like he's
taken her away from me, and I'm too shy to compete with this
guy.
Is there anything I can do?
-------------------------------------- Hello!
If you're too shy, then just lie down, do nothing, and be
alone the rest of your life.
My brother, I fully understand
how you feel, but you aren't going to use the "shy guy" crap
with me. I know how much anxiety this can give you, but you're
just going to have
to get over it as it's going to affect you the rest of your
life negatively if you don't.
The good news is that you CAN
get over it! You're don't have to be shy the rest of your
life and just
suffer with whatever
life gives you. You can actually take what you want, (and leave
the rest to the other "shy guys" out there!)
You do this by getting yourself educated. I suggest that you
read my book as a very good start. In addition, decide right
now that you're not going to use being shy as an excuse any
more. Just stop it. It's time to grow up and be a man. If you're
not sure how to do this, that's ok - that's what the education
will give you. But, don't let that stop you either.
Find a "role model" whose persona you can adopt.
I like James Bond or Tom Cruise's character in "Top Gun".
These are great models to follow. Then, fake it until you make
it!
Just because this guy has already
taken the first step doesn't mean that you're out. After
all, it's
HER decision - not his!
Just go up to her and say, "You know, we need to spend
some time together and get to know each other. Let's have coffee
this week. How's either Thursday or Saturday?"
Believe me my brother - it really IS that simple! Take a few
small steps, get a few successes and watch your confidence
level soar.
Best regards...
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Have a love, relationship,
sex or man/woman question? I answer all email. You can write
to me at dwneder@beingman.com
for answers. For more information about my books, "Being
a Man in a Woman's World" (volume I & II), and other
products visit: www.beingaman.com.
Check out the discussion group at: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/beingaman.
Copyright (c) 2004-2011, Dr. Dennis W. Neder
All rights reserved.
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