KissMeGoodnight
Article Series: Nice Guy Dating
I Just Want a Great Woman, Dammit!
The
Second Date: You’re Not “Dating” Yet
Just
because she’s said yes to a second date doesn’t mean your
dating exclusively, so don’t jump the gun
and declare that she’s yours. You might like her a lot and
you’ve been waiting and searching a long time for someone as
pretty, funny, smart and cool as she is.
But you shouldn’t pin your hopes all on this one person just
yet, and she shouldn’t do that to you, either. It can be a
big turn-off and feel desperate to the other person who begins
to view you as “clingy” or territorial.
Dating exclusively is a big step. No, it’s not as big as moving
in together, but it does represent a level of commitment and
while you might think you’re ready by the second date, you’re
probably not. There’s nothing wrong with giving it some time.
For some, dating exclusively only takes place after several
dates and a discussion in which the agreement is made to only
date each other. Until then, there’s nothing wrong with dating
around for awhile until you both decide that you like each
other best out of the dating pool.
Here’s how to keep things from getting too serious, too fast:
- Continue
to date her regularly, but date other women too - and
assume she’s dating other guys.
- Use
this time to really get to know her, and to understand
your feelings about her. Are you feeling desperate,
like you must have her all to yourself right now? If that’s
the
case,
you need to figure out what’s going on with yourself.
Are you in love or are you desperate to have a girlfriend?
- Keep
the early dates fun, light and casual. They’re meant
for getting to know one another. You have a lifetime
to get into deep, meaningful conversations.
- After
several dates, if you really do like her, make the dates
a bit
more romantic and see how she responds.
If her
response is favorable, there’s a clue that you
both might want to take it to the next step soon.
- If,
after several dates over the period of at least a few months,
you still think she’s someone
you want
to commit yourself
exclusively to, then it’s time to find out if
she
feels the same.
If you get to the point where you feel it’s time to become
an exclusive couple, you can start a conversation with her
about the subject. You should have a pretty good idea beforehand
if she feels the same, so hopefully you won’t get any unpleasant
surprises. Make sure that you’ve taken the time you need to
date other women to see if she truly is a good fit for you.
This won’t happen overnight, so don’t try to force it. Click here to learn what goes on inside a woman's head. It's a man's guide to the female mind. It's my KissMeGoodnight recommendation.
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by KissMeGoodnight.com
: 2008
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