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Step 4: Meeting Face To Face

Once you have started talking over the telephone, then the relationship has already taken wings. There is no reason to postpone a direct meeting. So what are you waiting for? Wait. There is no need to push it. You should not sound overanxious to meet this girl or guy.

Let the decision to meet evolve over a number of telephone calls. There are certain things that you can bear in mind before you really meet.

 

The Rendezvous

It is not advisable to invite someone home before you have really met the person. You had better choose a public place - preferably somewhere there are plenty of people around, just in case, you know.

That is why most couples prefer to meet in a restaurant over lunch or dinner. There is one thing about having food together. When people sit together and have food together, they get to know a lot about each other.

Table manners tell us a lot about a person’s upbringing and background and you can learn a lot about a person by observing him or her eat. The second thing is that warm food has a wonderful effect on the human mind. It releases all those digestive juices and sets the tongue wagging. People loosen up a lot, especially after a glass of wine or two.

The first mistake that most people make is that they go under the wrong impression that a meeting, even the first meeting must end up in bed. No, it does not have to be so.

There is no compulsion on your part or anyone’s part that you have to take the person home with you. Just because you enjoy talking or chatting with a person it does not necessarily mean that you have to sleep with the person. Let that too evolve, so it is best to keep any such situations that might lead to a bedroom scene completely at bay.

So how do you do that? The first thing you should do is that you should be clear about the time. Evenings are tricky times to meet. If you have dinner together, then there comes the possibility of dropping the other person home.

And of course you can’t just accept a ride and walk away after being dropped without inviting the other person in. And then one thing will lead to the other and then the inevitable is bound to happen. Of course, if that’s the way you would like it to be then you just have to do what I just told you not to do.

Lunch time is the best time because in the daytime most of us are busy with work and we can just spare an hour or a half for lunch. So you can always leave on the pretext that you have to get back to work or something like that. Very few people end up going home together after lunch. Another thing is that at lunch the element of romance does not really come into play.

Take care to be at the arranged spot on time, you certainly do not want to keep a person you are meeting for the first time waiting. Dress appropriately for the occasion, keep it simple but at the same time it should be something that looks good on you.

 

Leaving Your Mark Behind

Now, suppose this date did work out as planned and you really and thoroughly enjoyed the company of the other person. You want the other person to remember you and think about you, wouldn’t you? So how do you make sure that the other person does think about you?

The answer is simple. Just leave your mark behind. Mind you, a business or visiting card is not appropriate here. It lends a very formal color to the picture. Surely you do not want the person to remember you for your credentials or your designation. Something more personalized is more appropriate.

Put your artistic and creative talents into full gear. If you are poetic, you could pen down a few lines on a small card and hand it to the person. Mind you, the lines should not be about the person, but about general topics like friendship, relationships, togetherness, warmth, or meetings. But do the writing in advance and keep it for the right moment. Do not try to write a poem on a paper napkin with the person sitting in front of you!

If you can’t write poetry, maybe you could get some dried flowers and stick them onto a card and copy down the lines of somebody else, but admit that the lines are not your to the person.

Keep such a token with you and wait for the right moment. Just before you part, if you are sure that “this is the one” then hand it over to the person with a very shy expression on your face and a timid, “I made this for you…” Believe me, it’s miles better to say “I made this for you” than “I bought this for you”

So what happens if you are not too sure that you want to see this person again? Well keep it with you itself and save it for the next person.

If the person is the right person, and if you did hand the person this personalized token, the person is sure to think of you in a much fonder way.


Clothes Maketh A Man (Or Woman)

You do not have to be dressed to kill when you go out to lunch. The best thing about lunch dates is that most of us will be in our work clothes and that saves us the agony of choosing the right thing to wear on a first date.

A wonderful thing that you could do when going on a fist date is to make it a group activity, preferably a foursome. This takes away the awkwardness of the situation and definitely takes away all those embarrassing moments of silence.

A group has another advantage in that lesser attention will be focused on each other so that there is less stress and as a result both partners will be more relaxed. It is also safer too, since there is safety in numbers.

But the company to be included should be mutually agreeable and not be thrust upon the other person. But take care to avoid any person who you know to be a chatter box; it takes all the fun away if one person dominates the conversation.

You may drink if you want to, but do not drink too much on your first date. Not only is it in bad taste but when you are drunk, you might blurt out something which you didn’t mean to and that might ruin everything.

                    

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