KissMeGoodnight
eRomance Series: Online Dating
Online Dating & Personal Ads -
Super Secrets To Finding Your Mate
( 17 pages )
What
To Look For In A Date
More
Than Looks...
Sit for a minute
or two and try and think about the things that interest you
and things that you would find interesting in a person.
By ‘things’, I am not referring to physical attributes.
I am not referring to something that might interest you in
a person’s physical appearance. Again the distinction has
to be drawn between a serious relationship and a casual relationship.
In a casual relationship, the importance is always the
physical attributes. We are more concerned with what the
person
looks like and what the person has been endowed with.
On the other
hand, if we want a serious relationship, then the physical
qualities are not so important. Compatibility is
probably the most important factor. Along with that, there
are certain qualities that obviously you will be looking
out
for. I am talking about qualities of the mind. After all,
beauty is only skin deep!
This idea might
sound strange, but it is actually true. The idea is that
it
is possible to grow to like the looks of a person. Once you
find the character of the person agreeable, you will start
liking the person as a whole. It is entirely possible to
fall in love with a person if the person does not look
like a movie
star. That is one of the tricks that nature plays.
There are many people who insist on taking a look at the
other person’s picture before actually committing to a relationship.
They might have their reasons of course, but I, for one,
feel
that such a decision based largely on looks is more suitable
for a casual relationship. It is bound to fizzle after
some time. After all, how long can you keep staring at a
person? And what happens if the person doesn’t stare back
at you?
Or even worse,
what happens if you find the person staring at another
person?
Looks may be important, but they certainly are not the
most important thing and should never be used as the deciding
factor
if you are thinking about a serious relationship.
Common
Interests
A human being
is not like a piece of glass though which you can look and
see the other side. A human being is more like a diamond,
which when held against light reflects and deflects light
so that a myriad of colors are seen. We’re complex.
We have a lot
of interest and the interests of one person need not match
with the interests of another. But thankfully the interests
are not as numerous as human beings. So we are bound to find
a lot of people who share our interests. And if we can find
someone like that, then our search should end there. So, what
are your interests? That is something for you to find out.
Mind you, you
might have to do some serious thinking before you narrow
down your preferences. There might be a lot of things that
you
enjoy
doing but about which you have never given a second thought.
Your interests could be something like sports or outdoor
activities. Or you could think of interests like social
work or crosswords
or religious interests. Keep the ball rolling; please understand
that the words I have listed here are mere suggestions.
Your tastes
and interests could be very different. So let them be.
And
once you have decided on what your interests are then half
the problem is solved.
What
Interests You In A Person?
This is probably
the more important part of the problem. Each one of us
has to sit and think about what we would like in another
person.
Having the same interests doesn’t necessarily mean that
you
can get along with a person.
For example,
if you a person who likes to talk a lot, it doesn’t mean that
you could like another person who likes to talk a lot as well.
If two people try to keep talking at the same time then obviously,
there cannot be any dialogue.
So also, if
you are the silent reserved type and the other person too
is the silent reserved type, there will hardly be any
dialogue at all! The word is “compatible.” The
interests of partners should complement each other and
not clash.
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