Are You Ready to Date Again
After a Long Term Relationship?
- by KissMeGoodnight.com

Those who have been in a long-term relationship understand how difficult it can be to start dating again after that relationship ends. It’s not always so easy to just jump right back into the dating scene after a long-term relationship comes to an end. Sometimes it is as simple as being fixed up on a blind date but sometimes you need to give yourself time to be single for a while before you even think about dating again. There are even times where it seems right to date casually for awhile before considering another serious relationship. You are the only one who will know for sure when you are ready to return to the dating scene. In the first few days after a long term relationship ends you may feel as though you will never be ready to date again and that even if you are ready you won’t recognize the signs that are telling you that you are ready. It really isn’t as hard as it seems though and paying careful attention to your feelings will help you to realize when you are ready.

Being in a committed relationship gives you a sense of security. You know that you will always have a date for Saturday night in your long-term partner and never have to worry about making plans or how you will spend your weekend. After a relationship ends, you may need a few weekends to just relax by yourself. You may want to spend some quiet time by yourself or some time with a platonic friend. This is a wonderful opportunity to catch up on some aspects of your life such as your friendships and your personal development that may have been ignored while you were in a relationship. You may relish this time at first but when you start to feel envious of your friends who are going out on dates or pine for a night out with a romantic interest, this is one sure sign that you are ready to date again.

Immediately after a long-term relationship, you may find yourself comparing all potential dates to your ex-partner. If those who approach you do not match up to your previous partner, then you are probably still not ready to date. You may still be feeling an attachment to your previous partner that is preventing you from committing to the dating experience. If this is the scenario, you are probably not ready to begin dating again. Feelings that you will never find a partner as well as your ex-partner are perfectly natural especially if you’re previous relationship was a healthy and happy one. A new relationship that begins when you are still in this phase is not likely to succeed because making comparisons is an unhealthy way to operate in a relationship. However, when you start to see potential partners for who they truly are without making comparisons or even thinking about your previous mate, then it is a good indication that you are ready to return to the dating scene.

Sometimes it is external factors that offer insight into whether or not you are ready to date. The previous example are all signs that you may notice yourself but sometimes your close friends may see the signs that you are ready to date before you notice them yourself. One such example is that you may subconsciously start dressing nicer or taking extra cares in your appearance when you are feeling ready to date again. This is a subtle way of letting others know that you are interested in meeting new people and entering new relationships. You may not notice this change but your friends are sure to notice and may start encouraging you to date again when they see this sign. Also, you may begin flirting more often. You may not notice this yourself but it may be a subliminal way of letting others know that you are ready to date again. If your friends notice you beginning to flirt with co-workers or the wait staff at a restaurant, they may begin to tease you about your actions as a way to encourage you to start dating again.

It’s difficult after the security of a long-term relationship to re-enter the dating scene. Being in a committed relationship for a long time may make you feel apprehensive about dating again because you may feel that you are out of touch with the current trends in dating. You may also be concerned that you aren’t ready to date again yet but paying attention to changes in your personality will let you know when you are ready to date again.

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by KissMeGoodnight.com : 2006

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