KissMeGoodnight
Article Series: Relationship Advice
What Does It Mean To Love Unconditionally?
In order to build a solid foundation in any
relationship, whether it's a marriage, friendship or a relationship
with a sibling or child, you must learn to love unconditionally
without limits or judgment.
Loving someone unconditionally can be hard to do and goes
against the grain you were probably taught in today's Western
society. Society tells you to get even or get revenge. However,
to love unconditionally requires forgiveness and letting go
of the wrongs.
So How Do You Love Unconditionally?
What's required to show someone unconditional love when you're
in a relationship? Being there physically, emotionally, mentally
and spiritually, through thick and thin, no matter what may
happen is unconditional love.
Physically: Being "there" for someone physically
means just what the word implies. You're there for them in
person, standing by their side, listening to them, or talking
with them so they're not alone. This may be at three in the
afternoon, or three in the morning!
Emotionally: When you're with someone emotionally, you're offering your
support by allowing them to honestly
and openly
express their feeling. Supporting someone emotionally with
unconditional love also means that you're there selflessly
to help them work through their feelings. The goal is for the
person to rise above the negative emotions and turn them into
positive ones. You're the shoulder to cry on!
Mentally: Supporting a loved one mentally
means that you help them think through their actions, motives,
and desires.
You help them do this by finding out what's going on inside.
To support someone mentally requires you to help your loved
one process their thoughts through to all possible outcomes.
Spiritually: Spiritually supporting a loved
one means you pray for and with them and help them grow in
all aspects of
their life - physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually.
Often spiritual support is given without a person being aware,
through prayer.
Unconditional love does not mean, however,
giving into every whim or desire. Often people confuse unconditional
love with
spoiling. Giving into a person's every want or desire when
it isn't appropriate can actually harm their physical, emotional,
mental, and spiritual well being. For example, giving into
your kid's demands for junk food may make them happy today,
but it isn't a good source of nourishment in the long run.
Letting Go
True love is shown when you try to help another
become a better person and unconditional love is shown when
you still love
them even if they refuse to change.
Many times it's necessary to "let go" of a loved
one, while still loving them unconditionally, because they
refuse to take the necessary steps to improve. An example of
this would be an alcoholic or drug addict. You still love the
person, but when they refuse to work at overcoming their addiction
or don't care about themselves or who they're hurting, you
must let go. Sometimes this means, letting them spiral down
until they hit rock bottom. Often you get hurt in the process
because you love them and don't want to see them go down this
road, so loving unconditionally also means that you'll be there
for them when they're ready to try again.
Love isn't an emotion or feeling - it's a choice. This is
especially true with unconditional love. In relationships,
you show unconditional love by overlooking petty mistakes and
forgoing judgment and grudges. Unconditional love requires
self-sacrifice and forgiveness on your part and it's through
unconditional love that those you care about will change for
the better.
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KissMeGoodnight.com
: 2009
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