KissMeGoodnight eLearning Series:
Your Sexual Health

Parents:
Facts About Sex To Share with Your Teen

Many parents find is difficult to talk to their children about sex. They are not sure when they should have this conversation or maybe they give the child too much information. The reality is that talking to your children about sex starts very early. When they first ask simple questions, you respond with simple answers. You talk to them according to the information they are seeking. If they see you are embarrassed on the subject, they will also be embarrassed. The best thing to do is be relaxed and show them you are confident about your. Convey the message that they should confident about their own body. Here are some helpful ideas to start the conversation.

Share your values with your children but remember as they grow up they will be making their own choices. Their values may not always reflect yours. Giving your child all the facts pertaining to sex is important. Make them aware that unprotected sex has consequences. Talk to them about the different forms of birth control and that both the male and female are responsible for birth control – not just the female.

When you talk to your children about sex, keep it light and funny and do not take on a serious attitude that will scare them. Let your child know that they can come to you with any questions they may have and assure them that you will not over-react. Share with them what your desires are for them and reassure them that you will support them through the all the changes they will go through.

Let your children know the difference between love and sex. Share with them the power of sexual attraction and that it takes will power to make the right decision. Remind them that love takes time to cultivate and respects each other. Let them know that love does not always mean sex. Often teenagers think being aroused is the same as being in love and therefore they think they can have sex because they love each other. Children learn facts about sex in school. They learn morals through religious training. The rest of life’s lessons come from the family.

Children have always learned from their parent’s examples from their earliest days. During this time of change, they will be watching parents even closer. When parents tell them they can ask us anything, do they really mean it? Will you as a parent listen calmly to their fears or questions? They are becoming teenagers, teenagers test the limits, and testing us is all part of the limits. Remember to not try to control them rather be patient with them while you describe to them there are consequences to all behavior and if they make choices that are poor in judgment, they will have to own that.

It is important during this time of growth in their lives that they have a good sense of self. Self-esteem and confidence is very important during this time. If they do, they will be more likely to make healthy choices and not give in to pressure to engage in unsafe behavior of any kind. Remember to praise them for making healthy choices and talking to them calmly when the choices that they made were not the best for them and explain to them why.

Parents want their children to love and appreciate their bodies. This displays very healthy self-images. Children with a good sense of self are more likely to stand up for their rights and the rights of others they see being taunted or pressured into making decisions that give away their power.

All kids begin learning to make good choices very early in life. At the same time, they also learn the consequences of unhealthy choices. This should not stop simply because they are now becoming teenagers. In fact, in a very loving way you should make clear the consequences of unsafe behavior. Demanding your teenagers do anything is a guarantee that they will. At some point, parents have to trust them to make their own decisions and face their own consequences. This is part of becoming an adult. Parents know all too well that the road is filled with many bumps on the way to becoming an adult.

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KissMeGoodnight.com : 2006

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